Weekly Wrasslin' Wroundup (May 11-14)

The WWE needs to learn that the solution to any perceived problem it has is not "more wrestling". There was another six hours of WWE wrestling on TV this week, and that's not counting the two hours I don't watch. So why are we getting a rush-job WWE Network exclusive Elimination Chamber in three weeks? It's not helping. Which is why we're totally starting this week's WWW with

LUCHA UNDERGROUND

...which had a seven-man match for one of seven MYSTICAL AZTEC AMULETS. It was also, thanks to the presence of many of LU's best high-flyers, the match of the week, but MYSTICAL AZTEC AMULETS. Why would you want any more than that? But you got more than that, including the Temple debut of Jack Evans and the heel turn of Johnny Mundo. Which made it...

...quite a bit better than...

WWE MONDAY NIGHT RAW

...I actually had a whole thing I was planning out in my mind during the Cena-Neville match. It was about how Cena and the WWE thinks he's putting people over by giving them ten minute, hard-fought matches, except that at the end, Cena still goes SuperCena, hits the AA, wins, and celebrates after the match like nothing happened. He'll sell for you and put you over until it's time to win, and from that point on, it's the old, annoying Cena. And then Neville hit his finisher and Rusev interfered before that could happen. So that was awesome, and a close second place for Match of the Week.

The news of Daniel Bryan's continued unsolvable, undefinable injury and his relinquishing of the Intercontinental Championship as a result is just a downer.

The rest of the show was barely there. It's always fun to see Cesaro manhandle Big E, and I'm looking forward to the tag title match on Sunday, but the rest was either filler, or, in the case of pairing Damien Sandow's Randy Savage impersonation with Curtis Axel's Hulk Hogan impression, the worst idea in the history of ideas, ever. But the Cena match still meant this...

...was better than...

WWE NXT

...which had another off week, and this was even taped before the Zayn and Itami injuries. Nobody really shone, the crowd's starting to turn on Baron Corbin, and the best match of the hour was weak by the standards of Itami, Balor, Breeze, and Rose. There weren't any interesting plot developments either. But at least there was only an hour of it, making it...

...a bit better than...

WWE SMACKDOWN

...which was barely even a show. All the matches except for the main event were short and pointless, so even the people I like to see didn't get any time. A lot of talking, a lot of bullshit, and a Kane-Reigns garbage match as the main event. Bleah.